大家帮忙看看！看看这篇作文能拿几分？水平如何？

Directions:Imagine you are a graduate who want to apply for study for study abroad.You want to study comparative
study of Chinese and Western literature at a university in USA。
Write a letter to the person concerned whichshoule include:
1,the purpose of writting the letter
2,your education backgroud,and
3,ask for the application forms and jinformation on scholarship
   
我写的文章
Dear Sir/Madam,
        Studying at your universty is my dream when I found l have fallen love with literature.For applying to study
comparative Chinese and Western literature,I write this letter to you .I'll be obliged to that if you read my letter at your conveninence.
       This summer ,as a student,with the management as my major, graduated from NANJING university and obtained
my BA in management.Athough ,literature is not my major ,but it alaways be my favorable course when I read some
famouse works.Attribute to working hard at literature in school ,I got my literatural BA and I believe that my academic
background can meet your general requirements.
       I'll appreciate you that if you can supply the application forms and information on scholarship.
       I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.
                                                                                                             Yours sincerely,
                                                                                                                 Li Ming

[ 本帖最后由 kyo00131425 于 2008-12-13 17:50 编辑 ]

to whom it may concern

5-6分吧，读起来思路不是很顺畅